Boyfriends and Girlfriends

There is a boy and a girl. They have known each other for a couple of years now. High School, University and now the mundane life that is their present. The huff to work, the endless hours at a nondescript desk and inane office jokes that almost make 9 – 5 unbearable, or almost as unbearable since it actually is 9 – 8. Yes, they had been friends for an awfully long time.

He had nursed her through her last break-up. She had done the breaking up. Nonetheless, six years required ice cream and shots, sometimes in that very order, others individually, but never too far behind. They were both used to helping each other out.

 

They had been asked many times why they never gave it a shot. Truth be told, they had each silently, and at different times during their friendship, longed to give it a go. They didn’t. So they ushered each other into kinship and friendship with no regrets.

He was about to be married to the girl he knew would be easy to love, for a long, long time. She was graceful and adventurous, lyrical and statuesque, one of the boys at a game and a diplomat at parties. –He had to have her.  And she had decided that he was stable enough to endure the ennui neither of them were prepared for.

He would never mention his hesitation, specially since he had no idea, whatsoever, that he had any to speak of. Why would he? Life was actually on track. Stable job by 30, marriage in the making with the right woman. What else could he want? Well something was wanting. He would find himself dreaming of his friend. She was pregnant and the father, unidentifiable, so she naturally asked him to step in.

Each time he dreamt that scene, he would wake up before answering, with a longing feeling he would shake off before his morning coffee. What was he supposed to do with this information? Was he just worried about abandoning his best friend after his wedding? That was bound to happen. Everything would change. But it was worth it, the woman he chose was exactly what he had always wanted. Perfect but not too perfect. Imperfections that magnified her beauty. He knew all this. Of course he would miss his friend. That is normal, change is good, discomfort brings growth. Why consider the alternative? A much harder and life altering alternative. He betrayed himself inasmuch as he told her about the dream, as friends do. She, well, she didn’t want to think much of it and laughed it off.

Why is it that the right questions stare you in the face, in the mirror, yet can’t muster themselves out of your mouth? Would everything be lost if you did? –And, how lost would it really be? Is a fine bird in the hand worth more than a best friend for the rest of your life? Who you can kiss whenever you please. He had to at least wonder what would happen if he were brave enough.

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